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SWAHP: Solutions for Work At Home Parenting, Issue #002 -- The Art of Discipline March 25, 2007 |
| Hello to all and a warm welcome to SWAHP: Solutions for Work At Home Parenting
In this issue:
1) Val’s Views: The Art of Self-Discipline 2) Parenting corner: What to Do When Nighttime Becomes Fight Time 3) Stress tip of the month: One Minute to Yourself 4) Time Management Tip: What Can You Accomplish with Time Management? 5) Money Saving Tip: Low Cost Activities for Bored Kids ******************************************** VAL’S VIEWS The Art of Self-Discipline There are things in life we can control, and many things we can’t. The one thing we do have some control over is ourselves. Self-discipline is controlling our words, thoughts, actions and emotions. We are driven by inner cravings and primitive drives sometimes so strong, they are overpowering. We must learn to rise above self-destructive behavior. Some examples of primitive desires are the urge to eat and the urge to sleep. Are you eating because you are hungry or because you are stressed? Are you going to bed because you are tired or because you are depressed? Is giving in to hunger or tiredness interfering with what you really want – health or a successful business? If we set goals for ourselves, there’s a very good possibility that the reason we have failed to attain our goals up to now has to do with getting in our own way. The question you have to ask yourself is how important is this to me? If the goal you have set for yourself is very important, then self-discipline is imperative in finding the way to get from here to there. Developing good habits must become a way of life. Don’t quit at the first sign of trouble. Don’t even quit at the tenth sign of trouble. There’s a very good possibility that when you’ve reached the point you want to give up, you’re almost there. Schedule time to work on your business and personal goals. Stay focused and persevere. Don’t give up before the miracle happens.
******************************************** Are you looking for a place to get started? If you’re looking for a way to start making money on complete autopilot without your own list, website or product - then this 'secret weapon' from my friend Ewen Chia will shock and thrill you. Ewen has created a revolutionary *turnkey* system that has to be the easiest way for ordinary folks to make real money for once...check it out yourself at secret affiliate weapon. ******************************************* PARENTING CORNER What to Do When "Nighttime" becomes "Fight Time" - Bedtime, Kids, Discipline and Stress By Kelly Nault When parents say, “It’s bedtime, kids!” discipline frequently follows. If any (or all!) of the following sound familiar, know you’re not alone: “One more story...pleassssse!” “I need another glass of water.” “Can I stay up just 15 more minutes?” Bedtime delays are an epidemic problem that plagues most households. If it’s not one more story, it’s “ten more minutes” of their favorite show or dawdling in the bathroom. We’ve all been there. Bedtime + Kids + Discipline + Anger = Chaos When your child puts up a fight at bedtime, responding with anger can often create even more problems. Your best bet is to be firm, yet loving. How? One of the most effective methods I have found is outlined on page 152 of my book When You’re About To Go Off The Deep End, Don’t Take Your Kids With You. Here it is: Tell Your Child What You Are Going To Do. Say something like, “Part of what I love to do with you is read stories at bedtime, but sometimes I feel frustrated when bedtime takes a lot longer than it needs to be. So from now on, I will be at your bedside promptly at ____PM to tuck you in. If you are not there at that time all ready to be tucked in, I will start getting ready for bed myself. If you would like a hug you can come and find me for a quick one, but I will not return to your room.” Follow Through. As stated be in their room on time. Give them one five-minute warning if you feel it is necessary (although it is not). If they are not ready, leave and be prepared to keep your mouth shut at all costs, regardless of tears, angry words or pleas to be tucked in. Go into the bathroom, lock the door, and get yourself ready for bed. Give one hug if they ask, then continue with your tasks. If they try to get you involved, simply say, “I’ll be happy to speak with you in the morning. Sweet dreams.” And that is all. Responding to difficulties in this way encourages your children to be punctual and when it comes to bedtime. Kids’ discipline doesn’t have to be harsh to be effective. Going to bed without a story is a commonsense consequence that results from bedtime dawdling. Usually, even a small consequence like this is enough to encourage your son or daughter to make good time management choices the next night. Dealing with the Boogieman Fears are natural, and your children will face many throughout their lifetime. The best thing you can do is to help them learn to deal with these fears, including the fears they face at bedtime. Take time to understand your son’s or daughter’s fears, and validate their feelings—but stay firm on the need for them to stay in their own room at night. Instead of letting them take refuge in your room, help them find ways of making it safe. Each time your child comes into your room, take them back to their own room and stay with them for a couple of minutes. Tell them that you have faith in their ability to handle the situation. Instead of telling them there is no boogieman, ask them what the boogieman is like, why he is there, and what he wants. You can even brainstorm with your child possible ways to live together peacefully with this creature. Suggest writing a note to the boogieman or visualizing a magical fortress that protects their bed. When they make it through a night on their own, encourage them. Silent Night...All Is Calm With a little bit of practice, nighttime doesn’t have to be fight time at your house. You don’t have the fear the words, “It’s bedtime, kids!” Discipline and angry words aren’t good approaches, but gentle, loving, firm patience that encourages your child to make good decisions is right on target. Before you know it, bedtime dawdling will be gone for good! Brought to you by: World Wide Information Outlet - http://www.certificate.net/wwio/, your source of FREE Content online. Kelly Nault, MA author of When You’re About To Go Off The Deep End, Don’t Take Your Kids With You inspires moms to put themselves first—for the sake of their children. She shares time-tested tools that motivate children to want to be well behaved, responsible and happy! Sign up for her free online parenting course at http://www.mommymoments.com.
************************************ STRESS BUSTER OF THE MONTH One Minute to Yourself When I was new to single parenting, I was sure I couldn’t possibly do all that I needed to do. I was fortunate enough to meet an elderly woman who taught me a lesson I never forgot. She said to me “If you don’t take care of yourself, you can’t take care of your children.” Are you taking care of yourself? Some people take better care of their job or their business than they do of their family. They may take better care of their family than they take of themselves. Life gets out of balance. What is the solution? I highly recommend the book One Minute for Yourself by Spencer Johnson, M.D. In it, Dr. Johnson suggests that several times a day, you should stop in the middle of whatever you are doing and take one minute for yourself. He suggests that you sit in silence and don’t look at your watch until you think a minute has passed. You will find that a minute is longer than you think. In the span of one minute, you can ask yourself if there is a better way for you to take care of yourself. Allow yourself one minute, as often as you can. Take care of yourself, so you can take care of your children.
******************************************* TIME MANAGEMENT TIP OF THE MONTH What You Can Accomplish With Time Management The core basics of time management include making lists, scheduling appointments, thorough planning and prioritizing. Other skills include the ability to make decisions, emotional intelligence and critical thinking. It doesn’t sound like much fun, does it? But think about what you can accomplish by improving your time management skills. Time management includes everything you do. The result you are striving for is having control over your life. The ultimate goal is balance. Improved time management skills will result in improvements in physical, intellectual, social, career and emotional areas of your life. The physical aspect involves having a healthy body, which results in less stress and fatigue. You will realize intellectual improvement in your efforts at constant learning and striving to better yourself. Socially, your personal relationships will improve and you will be an active contributor to society. On a career level, if you are a home-based business owner, personal time management is a must. There is no longer the ability to punch out at the end of the day. The quality of your work is more important than the number of hours you put in. Emotional balance is a fringe benefit of improved time management skills. Being organized will make you feel in charge of your life. Determine which area of your life is not being given enough time. Each area creates the whole you, and if you are ignoring one area, you are ignoring an important part of yourself. Review your goals, both short term and long term. What is your time being spent on? What things are occupying your time and not bringing you closer to achieving your goals? Work with your body clock. Plan difficult tasks for when you are feeling at your peak. Avoid procrastination. Learn to say no to family members and friends who are stealing your time. Time management is the art and science of building a better life. Minutes are what life is made of. Make the most of yours. ******************************************** MONEY SAVING TIP OF THE MONTH Low Cost Activities for Bored Kids When you hear that dreaded phrase “I’m bored!” try these fun and low cost activities with your kids. 1. Go to the park and feed the ducks. Bring crackers or stale bread. The kids and ducks will both be happy. 2. Bake cookies or brownies. Try your hand at baking from scratch. 3. Go bike riding with your kids. Visit local bike trails. 4. Visit your local library. Borrow books and video tapes. 5. Tape together several pieces of paper. Color a mural with markers and crayons. 6. Play hide and seek. 7. Try your hand at magic tricks. 8. Involve your kids in online games. My personal favorite website for children is http://www.uptoten.com. 9. Play checkers or cards. 10. Make a game out of housecleaning. Kids are surprisingly excited by things like washing the floor. Create a contest of racing to see who can clean a room fastest.
******************************************** If you haven’t checked out our resource page recently, be sure to visit http://www.work-at-home-parenting.com/workathomeresources.html
I’ve recently added a couple of free courses and e-books and will be continuing to add more free content in the near future. I would be happy to hear from you if you have any requests for something you’ve been looking for and can’t find or something you want to see more of. Fill out the contact form at http://www.work-at-home-parenting.com and I will be sure to get back to you promptly. Best of luck on your journey,
Valerie Dansereau
http://www.work-at-home-parenting.com Don’t just build a website! Build a website that works.
http://buildit.sitesell.com/valerie2.html |
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