Are You Experiencing Burnout?

Recharging Your Batteries

by Lorraine Cohen

In the past century our lives have become more complicated. By comparison, our ancestors led a simpler life, with priorities focused on family and community life. Well, times have certainly changed. We are accessible by beeper, cell phone, text message, voicemail, email and instant message, telephone, and fax - all day or night. Whew!

Add job responsibilities; including two family incomes or single parenting, living single, family and community relationships, and other time commitments. We're so busy operating in hyper-drive (especially in the USA!) that we can forget how to relax and unwind. Is it any wonder we often feel like we have no time to really enjoy our lives because we always have someone or some responsibility to attend to?

Family, social, and business responsibilities vie for your time and energy. Imagine yourself, when refreshed and energized, like a pitcher filled with water. Beside the pitcher are empty glasses, representing the people and situations in your life that require your time and attention. As each glass is filled with water (your time and energy) the water level in the pitcher becomes more and more depleted. If the pitcher YOU) is emptied without replenishment for too long, symptoms of burnout will appear.

"I can't seem to get motivated or focused. I feel stuck, I feel tired, distracted...like I should be doing more and I just don't feel like doing very much." Sound familiar? You might be feeling burned out and in need of recharging.

Symptoms of burnout include:

* Feeling emotionally over reactive especially with anger

* Depression

* Diminished performance/functioning

* Weight loss/weight gain

* Exhaustion - even if you have rested

* Self-neglect

* Irritability

* Numbing behaviors including addiction

* Poor concentration

* Sleep disturbances

* Mood swings

* Shift in eating patterns

* Decreased self-confidence and self-esteem

1 or 2 symptoms do not indicate burnout. Prolonged periods of physical, emotional, mental intensity can normalize the "appearance" of burnout. In other words, we can adapt to being in a state of burnout for extended periods of time, which put people at greater risk for medical conditions and/or psychological problems to develop. In that way, we forget what peace, calm, regeneration feel like.

Getting back on track:

1. Practice extreme self -care. I use extreme because taking the best care of YOU is serious! When needs are not being met, negative thoughts and reactions intensify. Does your life flow when you are neglecting yourself? Being positively self-ish and putting yourself first gives you the vitality and desire to be fully there for those you love - by choice, not obligation. When you take good care of YOU, the people and situations in your life will get the "best" of you instead of what's left of you! Give yourself permission to make self-care a priority. Practicing self-care will show others how to love and respect you by valuing and appreciating who you are.

2. Set strong boundaries and keep them. Practice saying no more often, especially when saying yes would be dishonest to your self.

3. Delegate things that need to be handled. Superheroes aren't real! If you "have to do it all your self", it is time to consider help. Be willing to give up some of your control to decrease all the things on your "to do" list. Recognize when you have a need AND ask for help (when help is available). Remember, the most successful people work with teams - they don't succeed alone. One additional plus is that delegating empowers others to raise their competency and confidence level. That's a win-win for everyone.

4. Decrease and eliminate energy drains. Clutter, people, situation, and things that sap your energy. Energy drains include: everything unresolved, undone, incomplete or avoided is an energy drain. Examples: clutter, unanswered correspondence/phone calls, unfinished business, repairs, unpaid bills, avoided conflicts/confrontations, negative thinking. Get the picture? Clearing out the clutter and energy drains will free up your energy dramatically and open more flow to your life. Have you felt stuck or blocked? Watch what happens when you eliminate clutter and energy drains from your life!

5. Schedule fun! I mean it.

Your call to action: In the next 30 days take at least one action from the list below.

1. Extreme self-care - Schedule personal time for yourself, regularly. You might be surprised at how powerfull small breaks (15 minutes) can be to recharge your energy. Many people feel at a loss to identify ways to increase their self-care. Need some ideas? Here are three suggestions to jumpstart your thinking.

* Play....read, draw, sew, sign up for a class, schedule a massage, meditate, have lunch with friends, go away for a long weekend, light some candles or whatever will feed your spirit on a personal level. Involve yourself in some light-hearted fun activities.

* Call a friend who always seems to be able to motivate you. Make it a person with high energy and a great laugh.

* Celebrate this gift of time and space. How often do you wish you had a moment to breath and relax, stepping out of the fast pace of life?

Identify what you enjoy and what brings you pleasure. Practice saying yes to yourself instead of saying no. MAKE THIS A PRIORITY. Worried about what others might think or how they might react? Remember, we teach people how to treat us.

2. Set boundaries - For one week, keep track of how many times you say yes when you really want to say no. Observe what motivates you to say yes instead of no. Tally the number at the end of the week. Practice saying no more often. Be willing to trust that people will adjust to handle what needs to be done if you aren't always obliging.

3. Delegate responsibilities to others. Start with small things if you are new to this idea.

4. Identify your top five energy drains. Decrease or eliminate them in the next 30 days. If you have a big job to tackle - like cleaning out physical clutter, chunk it down into small steps (a room at a time, one or two boxes, an hour a night) so that the task is more manageable. Get help if you need it!

5. Schedule fun activities into your calendar (in ink). Book an appointment with yourself. Do you enjoy having things to look forward to? Make that happen without delay.

If you start feeling guilty, face the guilt head on. See the guilt as a sign you are on the right track. Moving yourself off the back burner to the front position might make you uncomfortable for a while. In time, people and situations will adjust and feel more comfortable with the change. People learn to adapt. Additionally, by taking better care of YOU, you will help the people in your life to learn how to take better care of them.

One more point...

There is a difference between procrastinating and recharging. People who procrastinate have developed a habit of excuses,distractions, attitudes, and self-created obstacles to consistently delay action to resist change. Pausing to regroup doesn't mean you are taking a detour from your course. Slowing down and adjusting your lens of perception is necessary to move forward in your life with strength and purpose.

Recharging Tip: Develop an action strategy in anticipation of high stress and high activity periods. What this means is identifying those things (people, habits/routines, nurturing activities etc.) that keep you on track and in balance, day-to-day and during busier periods. When people are stretched too thin and feeling on the edge of burnout, figuring out what is needed to restore equilibrium can feel like one more task, burdensome and overwhelming. Preparing a strategy in advance allows people to recharge with deliberate intent.

If you're feeling stuck, ask yourself, "Am I procrastinating or do I need to recharge?"

Obviously you must practice discernment when making changes in your life. The rewards for taking better care of your self are boundless. You're worth it, aren't you?

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About the author: Lorraine Cohen, Business Consultant and Life Strategist brings more than 25 years experience in personal coaching, business development, psychological counseling, and sales to over 2000 business owners, entrepreneurs, and executives from a wide range of industries. Focusing on the whole person, Lorraine coaches people from the inside out; to implement innovative strategies that integrate their heart, integrity, and spirituality

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